Sprint and T-Moblile Happy to Merge and Become one of America's 8 Businesses
Big news was announced in the wireless world today. A merger between T-Mobile and Sprint has been approved by the FCC. We reached Sprint CEO Michel Combes for comment, "Well, it's a big day! We're really excited about being one of the 8 businesses who own everything in our fine country. This lack of diversity should really create some parody in the market and work out well for consumers." We also reached John Legere of T-Mobile who said, "This is great! I can't wait to take my cooking videos to the next level with added access to Sprint's customer base." It's not currently clear whether Combes or Legere gave FCC chairman Ajit Pai the blowjob that sealed the deal as it's speculated there may have been a threesome.
Ryan Kensington - November 5, 2019
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