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Coronavirus Released by Climate Activists to Mitigate Impending Environmental Disaster

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We just received an anonymous report that the coronavirus impacting the entire world was released from a lab by a group of climate activists.  This comes as a shock to the international community who have been implementing fundamental structural changes in attempts to slow the spread of the virus.  The note we received read simply, "We are Climaction, the virus that has brought blue skies, water and clean air back to mother earth.  Your children will thank us after you're dead which will likely be soon considering you buffoons can't stop consuming long enough to distance yourself from imminent death."  Law enforcement from around the world is forming an international coalition in attempt to find and apprehend Climaction.  Should we hope they're successful? 

Ryan Kensington - March 19, 2020

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